And The Ship Goes Down

Remember life exploding?

Yeah, it did that. It’s better now.

For the most part, I stopped writing for the remainder of November. I did get about 1,500 words written here and there at a few of the meetings. I still liked the novel, and still planned to continue it once I got back on my mental feet. Even managed to figure out the next scene and gotten half way through it. Cast another character as well, finding a picture that I added to a separate file folder and then put all the pictures into the Scrivener file proper. Felt good. Very productive.

That was the second last meeting, November 26th.

In the meantime, I’d noticed significant slow downs on the Macbook. No longer the svelte little number that booted nearly instantly, the Macbook was chugging far more than it used to. I figured it was because the hard drive was damn near full, so I thought I’d best do something proactive. I picked up a terabyte and a half external drive on November 28th. Like a good girl, I let the Mac run Time Machine on the external drive and then moved over the podcasts and movie files off the computer and onto the drive and made sure iTunes knew where everything could be located. I thought I was such a clever thing. Everything was working perfectly, and now not only did I have Carbonite running in the background, I also had Time Machine, including a scan of the hard drive before I started moving things around!

Thursday past was our regular meeting, and I was ready to get back to it. Had my notes, had my last (and unfinished) scene in my head, ready to go.

Only the novel was no where to be found.

I didn’t panic. Not then. Had this weird giddiness take over. Ended up chatting with my fellow writers as I methodically searched the hard drive for any telltale trace of the file. My folder of graphics was there, but the Scrivener file? Like it never existed. I tried searching on Carbonite’s off-site web interface but found it similarly empty, which I expected; Carbonite passively backs up what’s there, and if it’s not there, gets removed (as I understand it).

But I still had the new drive, which had taken a complete snapshot of the entire Mac just two days after the meeting when I’d last used the file. Don’t panic, I told myself. Look when you get home.

Well, I looked. And it wasn’t there.

I have to say that while I cried and shouted and then went numb, I did react better than the time I thought I lost 6 chapters of the last novel (tho’ I ended up recovering those…) where the crying and the shouting had lasted a lot longer. I contacted Carbonite customer support and we’re still trying to see whether or not they have an older cache of my files. For Window’s users, they have backups going back three months that you can access through their program. For Mac users, not so much, but I am betting (hoping, really) that it’s only because as a new release for the Mac, the interface doesn’t support it but the system still passively keeps three months of backups for every customer. After a half an hour through live chat, I’ve since sent some emails back and forth with the pertinent details, so there is still some hope.

Tonight, ironically enough, is the NaNoWriMo Thank God It’s Over (TGIO) party. I not only failed to complete NaNoWriMo, but my measly 13,000-word effort is now gone. I really don’t deserve to go. The only reason I’m going is because I made my super macaroni and cheese and it’s lonely in my house that won’t be my house for much longer. I was really looking forward to this weekend, but I’m getting more melancholy as it wears on.

Yes, I said I was holding out hope, but I’m not really.

It’s gone.

The best that can be done is to phase-outline what I remember ASAP. But I’ve got no spark for the work and tomorrow will be a series of interruptions, both welcome and non-welcome, which will fracture the day in a half dozen pieces that won’t be good for much of anything.

See? Melancholy. I gotcha melancholy right here.

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