I’m wearing it now, black with cute little pirate skulls. I can say cute because the graphic is all rounded, inoffensive. I wear it and I think not only of goths but of little old ladies with delicate scarves flapping in the wind as they peal out of town on a big black Harley. It’s like I can’t make my mind up about it, so it becomes possible of anything.
Perfect for writing.
I realize this is skipping deeply into the bizarre, but humor me. I’m alone in the house, I have my podcasts playing but soon it will be blaring, heart-pounding pop that I can mangle with my own voice at the top of my lungs.
I’ve skipped out on the coffee thing – I like my tea. I’ve been having a cup with Todd in the morning, and found it quite perki-fying, but prefer my flavored brews. I do have some scented wax melting away, filling my room with scents of mango and starfruit, the dog has been walked and I feel good. Really good.
I will be no where near my hope of getting my 10,000 words for Friday’s meeting at The Fromagerie, but I’ll have something done. I will be late for the meeting, as I only get off work at 6:00pm. Which means I’ll miss the cheese. And dinner. I dunno, maybe I’ll ask them to buy me a plate.
Even though I will be no where near my mark, I feel better about Spirit Cat than I did all December. Failing at NaNoWriMo doesn’t matter so much anymore, especially since it was a soft failure anyways as I still managed a decent output of words, more than I am doing now.
But I also realize that having routine is very important to me. I like knowing how to plan, what to anticipate. And work changes, I find myself paralyzed, like a kitten plucked from its mother and stuck on the couch having no real clue what’s just happened or where the hell I am. December sent me into training and in January the schedule changed again when we got onto the production floor. It will change again come February with the new shift bid that’s coming in the next few weeks. How do I plan for this? Will I be working days or nights? Should I start a habit now or wait until I know my schedule? Will I even be able to keep going to the Sudbury Hypergraphic Meetings, or anything else, if I get stuck working later? It’s not use telling me not to worry about it – it’s just what I do.
The only answer to “When will I write?” is then a) ‘Weekends’ (whenever they may be for me) and b) Mornings. Those are the only options. Hmm. Maybe I just figured out my answers. Pondering. Pondering.
(That’s why I like this blog o’mine – even if no one is reading, at least the illusion of me talking to another person helps me figure out what I probably already know already but haven’t articulated.)
Now, to writing. “Arrrrr!”
PS: Ad Astra is shaping up quite nicely. Must go! Must find buddies to go! *squee* http://www.ad-astra.org/
